One day last week, I discovered a pile of Cameron’s school work on my coffee table. I’m used to these piles magically appearing. When there’s something from school that needs my attention, instead of handing it directly to me, Cameron leaves it somewhere where I can’t miss it. It’s almost like a mystical creature has paid me a visit. Not the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus, but perhaps it’s the Homework Elf or the School Fairy who has brought me something special. On the top of the latest pile was indeed something special. It was a certificate of completion for an intensive reading program Cameron had been working on throughout high school. I’ve noticed that the School Fairy seems to bring me things for which Cameron is very proud, and I wonder if the School Fairy brings them to save Cameron from embarrassment of mom gushing over him.
Another item of interest in this latest offering from the School Fairy was a Time Capsule. On the first day of school, Cameron completed a form indicating what he had already accomplished, what he looked forward to, and what he was worried about. Since I have been consciously hands off when it comes to Cameron completing his school work, I enjoy getting these unexpected glimpses into Cameron’s thoughts about school, and I realize how insightful he really is. In response to “One thing I have already accomplished,” he wrote, “Internship I know how to behave and work well.” Yes, I’d agree with that. I was surprised that he was most looking forward to Instrumental Music. I had expected him to hate that class, and even warned the teacher as much. His biggest worry was Anatomy and Physiology, which turned out to be a just worry, as it was the class he struggled with the most. School has always seemed like routine to Cameron, so I never really gave much thought to him worrying about anything or looking forward to something. It’s nice to know he does both.
I liked this idea of a Time Capsule, so I decided to look back at the columns I was writing at this time last year. "Miles to go Before I Weep " is about how I experience the milestones of others quite differently from the milestones on my own son. I must say, one year down the road, as Cameron and I prepare to attend the graduation ceremony of many of his classmates, and he prepares for a second senior year, much of what I wrote last year holds true. But oddly, I feel a little more at ease about what the future holds for Cameron, and his high school graduation doesn’t feel like quite as much of an abyss as it did last year. I don’t know why I feel more at ease, because I am no closer to finding a postsecondary solution for Cameron. While the options for consideration may not be changing, Cameron is. He is becoming more and more mature every day. And he has a self-awareness about him that I’ve not noticed in him before. I had heard about "developmental pops" happening beyond the school years, but never really held out hope for Cameron experiencing such a pop. You know, expect the worst, hope for the best? I was hoping, but not expecting. But I daresay, Cameron may be in the midst of a pop. This further vindicates my decision not to push for an on-time graduation. I may just get this patience thing down.